Over the February break, we took Dyleva to Cancun. It was not my idea, but I did agree to go.
It's not a vacation if you have children with you.
Anyway. A lot of my anxiety was centered around the four hour flight.
As a former flight attendant, I have been very critical of parents and the lack of control they had over children, and safety concerns, on an airplane. I am determined not to become that Mom, the one that lets her toddler run up and down the aisle.
Our solution? Bribery.
It worked. Jeff brought the inflight entertainment, and I brought a big bag of gummies and suckers. Unheard of in our house.
But, it occurred to me, that my children should be perfectly well-behaved. They were in heaven. This airplane was built for people their size.
They had plenty of space to fidget and move in their seats, and sleep comfortably if necessary. I looked at the tall guy across the aisle from me, whose knees jutted out passed the seat in front of him into the aisle. He dutifully is not using his armrest to give it to the poor sucker seated next to him in the middle seat. The poor guy looked partially curled into the fetal position for four hours.
Then I looked at my kids.
They had on demand in-flight entertainment, food, and beverages. Mom, at their beck and call- a personal waitress to cater to their moment to moment need. Most people have to pay and wait for that.
Why shouldn't they be perfectly behaved?
So just for fun...we took Dyleva on an adventure! We journeyed to Frozen Falls! I had never been to Niagara Falls in the winter and was excited to see it.
We arrived in frozen city about 6PM. It was already dark out. First, we had to scale a wall into a bank of snow to reach the passage to the Falls. Next, we had to parade down a street of lighted trees. The street ended at a wooded forest. We went through the forest that ended at a slippery path. We slid along until we reached the frozen falls. It was about 6 degrees while we were sliding into frozen mist being whipped at our faces. The ninos were whining, but we wouldn't let them give up.
.jpg)
We reached the falls, we stood, we admired, we took photos. It was anticlimactic- but it was fun, and Dylan talked about his adventure for three days.
Then we went to the Hard Rock. It was a fun family adventure!
I was listening to my daughter today, having a conversation with her brother on the way home from school. She was in the mood to educate the boy, and today the topic was Martin Luther King Jr.
Now we are suburban and live in a mostly white community. However, growing up, Eva has had African-American, Hispanic, and biracial children in her daycare, preschool, and present in extracurricular activities. She has NEVER noticed a difference between herself and the other children. She has never commented on skin color or any other defining characteristics. We have never discussed it. There was never any need to point out a difference that was superficial and based on appearance.
So imagine my surprise when I overheard the following lecture from her in the car today:
"So Dylan, there was this man, and he helped people. His name was Martin Luther King. A long time ago, there was dark people, and people weren't nice to them. Light people, like you and me, we weren't nice to them. They had to use different bathrooms, different restaurants, and different fountains. And if they wanted to get on the bus, they had to sit all the way in the back. And Martin, he helped the people so the dark people were treated nice."
Eva continued for awhile, Dylan just listened.
I politically-corrected her on a couple of her assertions to her brother, but her whole conversation completely irritated me.
Although I love and celebrate the life of Martin Luther King (I teach his legacy to my own students), I couldn't help being bothered by the fact that she has never noticed a dividing factor between herself and a child of color. Now, unfortunately, I feel her attention will be brought to this detail immediately. Bummer.
Dyleva loves the water. My little fishies could spend hours in the bathtub. We have begun to take them swimming once a week to keep them comfortable in the water. Dylan has no fear and jumps right in. Eva loves the water just as much, but doesn't like putting her face in the water. Just recently, Dylan has begun to summer sault in the water, and Eva has been using her goggles and swimming under water. These two love playing together, even if they are wrinkled.
